Expectation
If you have parents then in one point in your life be it in the past, present or future,
They will always expect you to do your best & be the best,
Walking down the memory lane during my primary school years,
I wasn't that bright at school nor did I particular care about studying,
As you all know in primary school the biggest exam that you'll be facing would be the UPSR paper.
This will decide which high school you'll be going the next year,
Unfortunately for me, who was the fifth in the family,
With many smart siblings that already have gained excellent results..
Of course comparison will always happen to me,
No pressure of course (tons of pressure),
I was living in the school dormitories since I was in 3rd grade,
So, I wasn't that close with my siblings & I didn't particularly care to go back home during the weekends (not helping the relationship any better)
There was a many moments where I doubt whether if I was even needed in the family,
Being compared certainly doesn't help in anything,
Yet there was a moment where my late mom said to me,
It's okay if I even get one A in my UPSR exam,
It's better than nothing right?
But that hit me hard,
Was I that hopeless in the eyes of my parents,
It would be a lie if I said I didn't cry (which I did, buckets of them)
Still, I bounced back!
A week before the examination I did an all-nighter through out the week,
Where I gained my confidence and managed to get 4 A's and 1 C in my exam.
I just wanted to prove that I too can achieve great results in exam.
The life of a middle child certainly sucks in terms of comparison and competition with siblings,
Still I love my family & grateful for having them in my life.
Love comes in many forms and shapes, it's up to us in appreciating them & how to receive them accordingly.
posted by Hanisah Suria @ Sunday, February 24, 2013
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